Birth & Parenting, Podcasting & Retreats
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Invite me for A Sleepover

9/4/2015

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Visit this blog at www.DoulasofChicago.com!




Authored by Ariel Swift
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U-Shaped Parenting

8/28/2015

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"Let's talk about it."

It's not flashy, but it may be the most creative thing that I have ever shared with my daughter.  And I say this because, of something I just heard yesterday.

I was listening to an interview with Todd Henry, author of the The Accidental Creative and most recently Louder Than Words where he talked about the "U shape journey" of the creative process.  He described what was involved in the work of being a creative; the layers, experience, learning, time, challenges, and struggle that made success look easy...from the outside.  And he affirmed that you can't get there without all of that stuff.  That to make lasting, long term progress, sometimes we have to be inefficient in the short term to be effective in the long run. 

I can't think of a better description of parenthood that I've heard in the last half of year. 

Let me share a little bit more about this U shaped journey: he likens it to taking a hike down, through, and up a canyon.  When we start our journeys, be it a project or parenthood, we can see across the gap to the other side.  We can see the end result.  We can see our baby breastfeeding well, that our baby sleeps through the night.  We can see our toddler using a toilet and not using a diaper.  We can see them reading books, or riding a bike, or learning to swim, or ANY of the millions of things our children will learn in this life. 

In our minds we see the end.  So we start.  We get excited!

In essence we hike down the path. 

We decide that we will try a sleep sack.  Or a white noise machine.  We start the process of introducing a potty and teaching cues to go pee.  We spend time reading books to our children, we introduce letter sounds and names, and then sight words.  We use scooters, then training wheels.  We start at the beach on the sand, with toes and legs in the water. 

Then we get to the bottom of the "U" and something happens. 

We are surrounded by weeds. The path isn't as clear.  We look up and can't see the end.  It starts to get dark and we realize the trip is longer than we planned and we will have to camp out in the bottom of the canyon for a night. 

When we are in the bottom of those canyons,  when we have tried to keep our focus but the path gets blurry, it starts to feel like failure.  It starts to feel completely hopeless.  It starts to feel like a mistake. 

We question our direction.  We question our decisions.  We question what got us excited in the first place. 


But the next day, the sun comes up, and we have more light, we keep going on our path, and we we start to climb.  We climb up the other side of the canyon - each step hard, but showing incredible progress.  And before we realize, we are at the top, on the other side. 

We are there, with our baby who can breastfeed seamlessly.  We are there with our baby who is sleeping through the night.  With our toddler who is potty trained, or our young child who can read herself a story or ride a bike, or swim for hours. 

Through the canyons I have already hiked with  my daughter and the many that are come come, I know I will continue to use a phrase that invites cooperation - "Let's talk about it." 

I would talk with my girl friends when my baby was causing me worry.   I would talk with my husband when it felt like I was losing my mind.  And I would talk with my daughter.  Even when she had no clue what I was saying. 

Just recently, when she was not interested in picking up her room, she even said it back to me. "Let's talk about it, mom."  And I was so happy that she used those words instead of fussing, and that she engaged in (if I'm being honest) a negotiation of sorts. 

Everyone goes through these canyons.  But from the outside we rarely see each journey.  We rarely see them at the bottom of their "U." 

And what I'm learning, and what Todd Henry affirms, is that the process is important. 

For some families, deciding to have a baby is the starting point of their canyon.  Prenatal education, IVF, IUI, surrogacy, or adoption are all huge undertakings.

Some families are able and happy to be pregnant, but are lost when it comes to birth and labor. 

Some families are solid for labor, but have zero help or plan for postpartum. 

When we are in the weeds and need help getting back on track, to get caught up, or to start the process with some help, you need to be able to know who can help. 

Know that you don't have to to this alone.  Contact me for early support for pre-pregnancy or labor support or postpartum support and you can have all the help you need along any part of your U-shaped journey.   

Authored by Ariel Swift, A Swift Doula





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Scapegoat Doula

8/14/2015

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It is not often, but there are times when I am the Scapegoat Doula.  

It is not a comfortable spot to be, but it is recognized by birth workers that sometimes families need a release of tension and anger.  Sometime it comes out as blame.  And sometimes that blame is laid upon the doula.  

Birth is unpredictable.  A "perfect" pregnancy can turn into a high risk delivery extremely fast.  A well-progressing labor can turn into an emergency cesarean delivery.  Families are left with little opportunity to choose any option other than to follow their care provider's lead.

People know that they are not medical experts and they should take their care providers advice.  But doing so doesn't mean feelings of disappointment, confusion, and helplessness are easy to manage or understand.  

Families may be left asking: 

Why did this happen? 
Why couldn't I stop it?
What went wrong? 

And under it all, "WHY DIDN'T I GET TO CHOOSE?!"  

The loss of participation is extremely unnerving.  The handing over of one's body to be surgically cared for is not the image of child birth that makes many women get warm fuzzy feelings.   The sudden care by professionals is one of the many reasons women are happy to have birth in hospitals, but the hope is that those services will never be used.  

In instances an immediate medical response is necessary, families search for answers.  They look for reasons why.  They want a cause for the effect.  

And sadly, it is not such an easy thing to find for some.   

With as much as we know about birth and bodies, there is still no way to know what path a woman's labor will take.  

"I knew that it was time for the babies to come.  I went in for the cesarean, but then, they couldn't get the spinal placed right. I heard them talking normally, sometimes directly to me, but then they got quite and were whispering to each other.  I couldn't see anything.  Then the baby was born but they said he had to go straight to the NICU.  Then I was horrible nauseous, and I said I didn't feel right.  I wake up and was in a different room, and it seemed like four people had their hands inside my body.  Then I was told I might need an emergency hysterectomy.  They got it under control, but I needed blood transfusions and no one could tell me what was going on."

Hiring a labor doula does not guarantee an outcome.  Having a doula scheduled for postpartum care does not guarantee any result.  BUT, hiring a doula for your labor or recovery means you won't be alone.  And by sheer proximity, sometimes the doula is the emotional dump for the mother, partner, or the whole family.  

And that is ok.  

I can be that person for you.  

You can unload anything on to me.  

I am your doula.  

If your mother needs to send me angry text messages; I can read them, call her back, and talk her through what is going on.  

If your partner is freaking out and wants someone to blame; I can be blamed, I can be yelled at, I can take it.  

If you are angry and are confronted with feelings you don't know what to do with, you can yell and scream, and cry, and be angry with me if you need to.  

I can take it.  I am your doula.  

Doulas are present and helpful for birth and postpartum, and sometimes those events aren't completely happy and joyous.  It isn't talked about.  But it is real.  

Doulas are there for you thorough any situation.  Your goals become our goals for labor and recovery, and when goals aren't met, we know that those feeling are in direct disagreement with your vision of success.  

But even when your original version of a successful situation is shattered, your doula will be there to help you pick up the pieces, and be with you, still without judgement, because when there is no known reason why unfortunate events happen, you should hear that IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

It is not your fault.  

You are not broken. 

It is not your fault.  

So know that a doula is not just for unmedicated birth.  Know that a doula is not just for position changes and encouragement through labor.  Know that a doula is there to help with the hard feelings just as much as the joyful feelings.  

I can help carry the load you bear.  I hope you won't need to use this part of my care, but please know that you can.  

Authored by A Swift Doula
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Making The Load A Little Lighter

6/30/2015

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Making choices takes a lot of energy. 

What I'm talking about is being proactive.  Being forward thinking.  Investing time into planning instead of wasting time reacting. 

I have talked a little bit about reacting and responding, and some of the differences in a post last December about decisions in labor.  It can be hard to feel prepared for something that you didn't know would happen, so having the B.R.A.I.N. tool ready can be a huge help!

But that's the game of life right?  We never really know what is coming next in the big picture, so we do the best we can.  We budget our money, we allocate our energy, we prioritize our schedules.

And then we have kids.

And nothing is ever really child-proof.  Time ceases to operate as we thought.  Emotions are fickle.  We are caught unable to plan for dinner, let alone the week, month, or next 18 years. 

There is so much time for planning when you are pregnant.  There are parties, books being read, thoughts about going-home outfits, car seat selection... all that time will feel luxurious compared to what happens after your baby arrives. 

There is a term that circulates:  baby brain.  It is the feeling of having lost one's ability to think logically, or remember events or facts once your baby is born.  Some of it comes from being woken up every 2 to 3 hours.  Some of it comes from being bewildered by this new little love in your life, and some of it is complete unexplainable. 

(Some moms tell me they feel like part of their brain was actually sacrificed and given to this new human.  They hope their old self will come back!) 

The eerie passing of time, the new responsibilities, the reality of your expanding family can make all the plans you had fly right out the window.  Responding turns into reacting.  And events regress into meeting the needs that now come hour by hour. 

This is hard for many parents, but this is totally normal. 

What I hope for new parents is that when there are able hands near to help, and that the loads will feel lighter instead of heavier. 

Sometimes visitors who are trying to be helpful end up being a burden or making a bigger mess.  Sometimes family that is there to support instead inflicts judgement.  Sometimes there is no one else. 

When you are in your planning stages for you expanding family, keep in mind that a person you can count on to help ease your load is a postpartum doula. 

Your postpartum doula can help with new infant care or help nurture your family with meals.  Your postpartum doula can support your breastfeeding journey and help you get sleep.  Your postpartum doula can listen to your concerns and help you feel better prepared for what is next. 

A postpartum doula will not do one thing - and that is make your new normal harder for you or your family. 

I invite you take some time, while it is in so much abundance, and consider if bringing a postpartum doula into your after-care plan is a proactive step you can take to help with all of the unexpected situations a new infant brings to your family. 

You are everything your new baby needs.  A postpartum doula can be there to ensure you feel up to responding to your new role.  

Question: Have you used a postpartum doula?  What was the more unexpected benefit?  What would you share to families thinking of this service? Share your advice!

Authored by A Swift Doula

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Into the Great Wide Open

6/17/2015

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Ever wonder why women have their first check up after delivery at 6 weeks? 

There is so much change at birth.  A new baby, a seemingly deflated body, emotions, sleeping patterns, responsibilities...

What happens at a 6 week appointment?

Typically, it takes 6 weeks for a woman's cervix to return to fully closed.  What may take hours, days, or weeks to open, does not return like a springy rubber band.  Care providers are concerned about bacteria, infection, and healing.  At 6 weeks postpartum, they perform an exam and see if it is safe to use things like tampons, and have penetrative sex. 

That question comes up a lot...when can I have sex after I have a baby?  But that is another blog post for another day...

During the transition phase of labor, a woman is reaching the point where she is as open as her body can be.  Her cervix is dilated to 10 cms.  She may be vocalizing and her voice is open and round.  Her pupils may be dilated, and her blood is pumping through her veins and arteries in response to contractions that are getting longer, stronger, and closer together.

Her body literally makes space for passage.  Her cervix slides to the sides and graciously ushers a baby down to meet his or her new world. 

After you!  Oh please...go right ahead.  They are expecting you!

It makes so much sense, when you think of openness, that rules, boundaries, and plans, don't really fit there.  Think of some often used phrases:

Welcome with open arms.
I am open to anything.
Keeping options open.
Walking in with eyes wide open. 


In transition, when a woman is physically open, do not be surprised if plans get thrown aside.  If words she's never said come out of her mouth.  If emotions are all over her face and she seems unlike the woman who walked into the hospital, you're right.  She is changing right before your eyes.

But what is fascinating to me and I never tire of hearing about it, is the openness that continues once a family returns home. 

A woman is learning about her new body.  She is adapting to the needs of her child.  Her family is learning about the new person that is now a Mother. 

Feelings are bigger for a while. 

New skills are being learned.

New needs are being anticipated and most of all, a New Normal is in its infancy. 

6 weeks will be both an eternity of moments and then vanish in an instant. 

There may be questions that can't wait until that 6 week appointment.  There may be needs that can't be met by the arranged support you had before delivering. 

There may be times when the openness can feel too open and a woman needs help to close again.  To be surrounded again by support and kindness.  To be cared for with love and assurance.  To be given help for things she isn't yet ready to take on again.

All this to say, there are people who are trained to help in this period, and indeed longer, if a family needs it.  As your postpartum doula, I am available to support the closing just as I am able to support the opening.

Authored by A Swift Doula





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Habitual Apology

6/8/2015

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Ever get smacked in the face with a lesson?  One of those awakenings that is both blunt and truthful.  One which, after you notice it, you can't help but be smacked over and over with the day-to-day situations where you never noticed before?

For me it's apologizing.  Or was.

I was at a party last fall where I was called out by a friend (in a nice way) who made me realize I am/was a habitual apologizer.  I would say "I'm sorry" in situations that were just plain unnecessary.

We have a language where hundreds and hundreds of other words could be used, and I was editing down to an apology.  I know I'm not the only one here that can identify with this.

Mostly I know because I work with people who do it all the time.  New moms.  (I would say parents, but I don't really have moments with male parents where this comes up.)

And moms are saying it about things that require no apology.  At all.  Like feeling pain while in labor.  Or needing to feed their baby...again. 

Things like:
  • Having contractions Oh, wait just a minute, I'm sorry, I can't answer your question I'm having a contraction....
  • Being thirsty in labor I'm so sorry, can you get me my drink?
  • Changing positions No, no, no...I need to move, I'm sorry this position just doesn't feel good!
  • HAVING A BABY I'm sorry I made such a mess!

And it isn't reserved for the delivery room.  When moms get home, the I'm sorrys just keep coming:

  • Being sore I'm sorry I'm moving so slow.
  • A messy house (even if it isn't messy) I just haven't had time to pick up.  I'm sorry you have to see it like this.
  • A crying baby  I'm sorry!  I'm sorry! 
  • Being in Bed  I'm so sorry you have to be in here and see me like this. 

All of the things mentioned above are real situations that have happened, and I would bet all are common for many other doulas as well.  Some women prefer to be extremely private, so for them it IS completely odd and horrible that a visitor would be in her home and see this part of life. 

But guess what.  I'm a doula. 

It's not a statement I make often, but in reality I've seen a lot of vaginas and touched a lot of breasts.  The world of birth is not a scary or grotesque world for me, and the state of your living room, your baby's temperament, or your manner of dress are not judged.

You don't get points deducted for having unopened mail or a sink full of dishes.  In fact, how about I do those dishes real quick for you...No...it's fine...just relax!  Tell me how you're feeling.  How was last night? 

One of the things I talk about with my clients is how to prepare with realistic expectations of the postpartum period.  Not just with their own bodies, but with guests and family too. 

If it is important to you to have a clean home and a spread ready to go whenever guests may arrive, let's talk about ways I can help you prepare for that so you personally won't have to take over the brunt of that work AND the work of being a new mom. 

Sorry Not Sorry

Hashtags can be cheeky, silly, expressive, annoying, or whatever....

But I have fully embraced the #sorrynotsorry hashtag.   It was a step in my recovery, if you want to call it that.  

Just because I was made aware of my habit of apologizing didn't make it easy to unlearn it.  It took practice.  Quite a lot actually.  Months of it. 

But it has been a wonderful change.  Freeing. And I can see this as a positive change both for me and my daughter.  I want her to see me using an apology at times where it holds meaning and value.  I don't want to cheapen the phrase through overuse and inappropriate timing. 

I won't pretend that I understand your personal relationship with the phrase, "I'm sorry."  But I know in birth and recovery for the 6 weeks after (or more), there is a new normal where the feelings and tasks that used to be easy are no longer easy. 

There are no apologies necessary for that change.  It is not your fault.  It just is.

I'd love to hear from you reader!  Do you have a #sorrynotsorry moment you want to share? 
What was early recovery and postpartum like for you in your home? 
Did you feel guilt and if so, what for?


Authored by A Swift Doula









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Benefits of A Placenta University Graduate

4/29/2015

22 Comments

 
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Working in Chicago helping women through labor, birth, and their postpartum transition has allowed me a great view of one other industry close to doulas: Placenta Encapsulation.  Until now, I have not offered this service myself, and have instead tried to find placenta specialists in Chicago that were both safe, and reliable in their methods of processing and business. 

Just like doulas do not need a license or  training to practice as a profession, placenta specialists are not required to have a license or training either.

There HAVE been sporadic trainings available, and many placenta specialists have been taught by someone they view as reliable. 

However, it has not been until this week that an organization has taken a stand on how, where, and in what manner a placenta should be handled, transported, and processed for human consumption. 

This week, Placenta Prep* has had its inaugural training, and the placenta industry now has a new standard of excellence.  I am proud and honored to say that I was invited to attend this training and am moving forward to help raise the standard and safety of placenta consumption.  

Not all women will choose to use this aid for their postpartum recovery, however, those that do should be offered a method and option to do so in such a way that reduces possible risks. 

As a graduate of Placenta Prep* I agree to the following standards of practice for my business:


I will never transport a placenta for another person
This has nothing to do with convenience, and everything to do with doubt, uncertainty, and trust. 

I want there to be absolutely zero doubt in a client's mind that the placenta I process is the placenta that came out of her body.  To ensure that everyone involved agrees that the placenta is indeed the property of my client, I will never transport her placenta, even if it is directly from the hospital to her home. 

I am not licensed to transport a human organ, and to protect my business and your trust, I will supply you with the necessary materials and information to safely transport your placenta to your home after the birth.


I will service a placenta in the home of the person who will consume it
We live in a world full of bacteria.  Good bacteria and bad bacteria are everywhere.  When a woman gives birth, she and (especially) her baby are in a delicate healing period where her immune system may be compromised or fragile. 

To reduce any negative side effects of bad bacteria consumption, I will only process a woman's placenta in an environment her body is used to. 

By processing a placenta in the client's space, I am able to ensure that the placenta is hers, that the space is free of debris from other processed placentas, and is free from any potentially harmful bacteria that may reside in my home.  As safe as my bacteria is to me, it may be harmful to the delicate system of a newly delivered mother and her infant. 

The only way to ensure that there is as few harmful bacteria present, the client's home is the safest location for this service to take place. 


I will stay current on my Blood Borne Pathogens certification
This industry does not require a license, and does not require Blood Borne Pathogens Certification. 

However, to reduce the risk to clients and to myself, I will follow guidelines outlined in this training to ensure every placenta, regardless of origin, will be treated with the respect and care that it deserves.  To do this, I will always have a current Blood Borne Pathogens certificate while processing placentas.   


Benefits of a Postpartum Placenta Specialist
As a Postpartum Placenta Specialist,
a great concern is that I am able to be present and available to my clients while they are transitioning from pregnancy to postpartum. 

By offering my services in this way, and by abiding by these guidelines, I also make myself available to my clients to offer support IN PERSON!  I am trained and certified as a Postpartum Doula, and if you engage in my placenta services, you are able to reap the full benefit of my knowledge, care, and attention during my time in your home. 

You can benefit from having your placenta processed in the safest possible way, with as many risks reduced along the way, AND benefit from time with a professional postpartum doula. 

I look forward to elevating the profession of placenta specialists in the Chicago area! 

Authored by: A Swift Doula
*Edited to update name




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DIY Parenting

4/10/2015

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DIY is great!  There is so much excitement.  So much anticipation!  You have the dream vision, plans, and you put in the work.  And then maybe more work...

I love DIY (check out a few past projects).  I love figuring stuff out.  I love demolition.  I love the way my body feels after a great day of hard work. 

My husband and I are beginning the search for a home, and we are talking about a fixer-upper, but …
 Do we have the time? 
Do we have the patience? 
Do we love each other enough to make it through the process?

In the very limited time I’ve been a parent, I have come to the conclusion that raising a child is the ultimate DIY project.  It is, in fact, one of the biggest DIYs one can take on. 

So get your gear, and load up your tool box.  Let’s dive in:

1. Designs can change 

You see it on shows all the time.  They were going to take out this wall, or leave that element in place, but then there is a load bearing beam, or mold behind the bead board.  Ah!  Designs change. 

If you are planning a huge family gathering after you come home from the hospital, but you realize only after you’ve sent out the invites that…
…wow, you just had a baby! 
You need to heal! 
You can’t take your infant grocery shopping!  You can't even put pants on yet. 

Change the plan.  Cancel the party, or have it catered – but you don’t have to be the host with the most.  It is okay. 

2. Measure twice, cut once

Whether it’s a board or a piece of drywall, materials cost money, so before you decide to make a piece of anything smaller, measure your space twice so you know your cut is perfect. 

With babies, you never know when they are going to have a diaper blow out, or a puke explosion. 

Take stock of your supplies. 

Do you have enough diapers?  Wipes? 
Do you have a burp rag? 
Do you need to throw in a snack for you or dad if someone starts to get grumpy? 

Check it out so you won’t be marooned with poop up your baby’s back, or puke down yours. 

3. Clean as you go

Demolition may be fun – the smashing, crashing, and physical nature of tearing something out.  But then you have to clean it all up before you can move on to the next project. 

Just like you have to get the rubble to the dumpster, when your baby starts to grow...
it may be helpful to clean out their things as you go. 

Do you have a plan for what to do when clothes get too small? 
Are you keeping them in storage?  Donating them?  Passing them to a friend? 

Think out where these items will go, because your baby is going to grow faster than you think! 

4.  Ask for help when you’re over your head

As brilliant YouTube is, some things require extra physical help.  Are you trying to hang a ceiling fan?  You might need a second set of hands. 

Same with parenting. 

Some days you just need more help. 
Call your friends or make a new one.  Family is a great resource too.  Don’t fell like you have to do it all yourself!  It is DIY, but perhaps it should be DIYS – Do It Yourself, Sometimes.

5.  Sometimes you need the help of the professionals

Perhaps your friends just aren't enough.  You are just in over your head.  Thinking you could re-wire your whole house was a bit much for a first timer. Call the electrician. 
Perhaps you really would benefit from a landscape architect coming to help you with a long term plan.  Perhaps you need a contractor. 

Same for parenting.  Sometimes calling a professional isn’t giving up, but instead just getting over a few speed bumps. 
For parents, many would benefit from hiring a postpartum doula. 

A person that can help design a plan, or get you over a rough spot.  I am happy to provide this service to parents looking for just a few hours, or a few days of care.  Looking for long term?  I can help there too.

Need some rest?  I can come for over nights. 
Need help for those hours when it seems your child has been bewitched? 
Do you have logistical questions about equipment, organizing a nursery, or breastfeeding with work? 
Let me help you. 

Adding professional care to your DIY plan isn’t you throwing in the towel – I promise.  You will be an incredible parent, and sometimes that means knowing when to call in the reinforcements. 

Authored by A Swift Doula.  
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World Doula Week - The invaluable side Of Doula Care

3/23/2015

4 Comments

 
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Yesterday, I shared that before becoming a doula, I had a wonderful, stable job working for Barnes & Noble.  I had insurance!  I had vacation days!  I had access to interesting people with interesting things to say and I was helping my community through literacy!  It was (how many more exclamation points do you need.....) ah-mazing!!!

And I made the choice to leave it. 

I then made the choice to become a doula.  A year and a half after starting my career as a doula, I became a ProDoula. 

When I was introduced to ProDoula through a woman named Randy Patterson, a few things happened:
  1.  I stopped feeling guilty for needing to make a living
  2.  I realized my attraction to this work was not just as a woman doing women's work, but it was a deep seeded need in me to be WITH women.   
For me, finding ProDoula was the key to a very large pad lock that opened feelings and memories that I had pushed away.  Why?  Because they didn't make me feel good!  Because of judgement, disappointment, or guilt.  And women are criticized for our feelings, aren't we?  So I put them away. 

And Randy Patterson and the other women I have been doing this work WITH, crawled in that deep dark space with me while sitting on Debbie Aglietti's basement floor.  And they showed me what it was like to really be with Women's Women.   Women who love other women.  Women who want big, inspiring things.  Women who understand that we will all do those big inspiring things in our own creative ways. 

I was a good doula before I became a ProDoula.  I knew all the right questions, I pushed on all the rights spots, I had the right information.  But after ProDoula, I finally really understood the need, and power of women showing empathy. 

Real support.  Non-judgmental support.  Being in the dark cave, together. 

And as I unlocked all of the pain, guilt, and disappointment, I started to let other things go too.  I started to let my "character flaws" out and stretch their sore limbs. 

Turns out, what I thought was flippancy was the ability to adapt.  Turns out what I thought was being bossy, was in fact my ability to be a decisive doer. 

I came back from an amazing experience and I started to try out this new self, with all my feelings and memories and baggage out for any who took a minute to see it.  And I started believing that my voice was powerful. 

And I now with this found voice, I learned to be much better listener.  I see and hear women trying to navigate through a world where pregnancy has made their own emotions a little closer to the top - those emotions are a little easier to access. 

Those emotions and fears are valuable.  They are valid.  They are good.

I walk into a woman's living room, and her emotions get all over her face, and she feels bad.  She feels wrong.  And I get so sit with her, and look at her emotions on her face, and nose and hands and tissues, and be with her.  And say that those emotions sound really hard and I am so glad she shared those really hard emotions with me. 

It isn't a space many people are willing to go.  My work lets me go there.  I get to go there!  I get to be a real women with other real women. 

And this is only a small part of the work that I do. 

But this is the invaluable part.  This is the part that gets hard to explain in a fee.


I talk about my on-call schedule.  I talk about being available on the phone.  I talk about specific hours of time and things like how many times we will meet, because in our society, these are the things that can be measured and checked off a list.  (And they are important too!)

But today, during World Doula Week, I wanted to talk a bit about what else the fee covers.  Non-judgmental support.  Being WITH you in labor.  Having a person in the room who is comfortable with all the ugly baggage and still looks you in the face and says, hey I see you over there.  Don't worry, I see you. 

Authored by A Swift Doula


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Other amazing writers are getting the word out about World Doula Week. Visit the World Doula Week Blog Challenge Blog Hop. 
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World Doula Week: Why Hire a Doula?

3/21/2015

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What is a Doula? 
A question that I'm hoping will get asked less and less, but a question I am happy to answer! 

I am a doula in Chicago, and when meeting new people inevitably profession comes up. 

"I'm a doula."
"A what?"
"A doula.  I work with women and their families to help ease the transition from pregnancy to a new normal at home after birth."
"What does that look like exactly?"

And I go on and on...

Traditionally, the word doula means a woman who serves, or if we are going back to Greek origins, a woman slave.   In the context of my work, it is specific to women who a pregnant looking for labor support, or who have recently delivered and are looking for postpartum support. 

And here we are, in World Doula Week!  A whole week devoted to learning more about this work, this profession, and how I can help you.

How can I help you? 
Why is a doula something to consider for your birth or your postpartum life?

Nuts and bolts of my job means I can provide support in areas you need, such as education, physical support through labor, or emotional support through this huge life event. 

 Having a doula means I am there to support and encourage, support and inspire, support and listen, support and remind, support and observe. 

All of this support comes without any inkling of judgement or opinion.  This support is the kind that can cause a woman to empower herself to make decisions that would be hard to make if she felt she were alone.  Decisions that might be hard to make if she started to compare her feeling to those of other women. 

As women, we each have an authentic view of childbirth and that view is something to celebrate.  But it can be hard to find it and own it if a woman only hears stories of opposing opinions or terrible experiences. 

When with a woman as her labor doula or postpartum doula, I have the wonderful joy of seeing motherhood unfold and bloom.  I hear ideas never voiced.  I am told fears that have never been released.  Through it all, I am there to look women in the eyes and tell them that they are exactly what their baby needs.  That they are strong and brave, and their choices are valid.  That their feelings are valid.  That their desires are valid.

These are words women do not hear enough. 


Why Hire a Doula?
If you have never heard of a doula or if you are starting to consider bringing one onto your birth team, I encourage you to think of events in your life that will be more important than the birth of your child and those early weeks learning about each other. 

The birth of your child will be an event that you will remember for the rest of your life, and it will swell emotions - good or bad.  Consider that for years and years to come,  when you are still remembering these moments, that they will inspire positive feelings or negative feelings.

Having a doula is not a guarantee of an outcome, but having a doula will help you take ownership of your birth and help you  "write a story they are proud to tell," as Randy Patterson pointedly says in her description of doula work.

Stay with me this World Doula Week 2015 as each day a different part of doula life gets discussed! 

What about you?  If you have questions to ask this would be a great week to discuss them!  Write in below with a comment, or mail me direct at ASwiftDoula@gmail.com.  I'd love to hear from you!

Authored by A Swift Doula

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 Other amazing women are getting the word out about doulas for World Doula Week.   Visit The World Doula Week Blog Challenge Blog Hop
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